her

we pull up and i see the car that makes me want to turn around and go back were i came from

shes so small, she is what I'm not.

so ridiculous she walks around in her underwear

I'm sorry I'm not that pretty

she puts me to shame

this is why i hate me...

insecurity.

the letter he wrote

he wrote her a letter...

describing the indefinite love he has for her, and then went on to say he cannot do this to his kids and wife. it was nothing for him when he came in and tore apart our family. the fact that his kids wont bear the humiliation and devastation that we faced was great. but once again we go in and come out as the underdogs. its amazing what two people in "love" can do to a family. they can make it or break it. I'm sick of being caught in between. i am ripped back and forth between stacked lies. he begged her to stay when life for us was looking up. but its all on his watch. his feelings his guilt. i try to be there for her but i have no example to follow.

no one was there for me. when i was torn between fathers i had nothing but a pillow to cry on. so how do i help someone when Ive never been close enough to them to understand. maybe we'll never understand each other.

blind for words

lost in silence

blind for words

i struggle to get back to my feet

i have stumbled so long before you.

and now that i know you

I'm afraid to be close.

tired from "what if" thoughts exhausting my mind.

i crawl in my skin

fearing to dismantle this new friendship acquired

I'm tired.

i feel like you could help me,

but I'm afraid once the lesson ends i suffer the consequences of the final test

"bad grade"

i failed to examine the former tragic heart break

and i fear to be a victim

I'm lost in silence blind for words

such silent enunciation .